Taking a Break to Come Back to You

For those of you following me on social media, you may have seen that I was out for the count the past week due to appendicitis. My job is pretty physical, and there's no sitting down besides your break. Depending on what you are doing that shift, you may be walking for 8 hours straight. I like the constant movement and prefer to move around rather than be strapped to a desk in front of a computer. However, last Monday, I was literally in the worst pain of my life. The only pain I can compare it to is labor; honestly, I think it was worse than labor. I worked for 8 hours in excruciating pain. The pain would get so intense I would almost pass out at different points throughout the day. As I sat there wondering if I was having a heart attack or just horrible heartburn it didn’t really cross my mind to go to the doctor. I went home, and the pain finally subsided enough to fall asleep. The following day, I thought I was better, so I went to work, and about an hour into it, the pain came roaring back. At this point, I knew I couldn't work, so I decided to go to the hospital.  I’m not going to get into the fact that the hospital read my CT scan wrong and sent me home with heartburn medication, only to call me in the next day with appendicitis. It’s been a wild week. 

Initially, I thought I would be back to work on Monday, ready to go, even though it's only been five days since my surgery. Taking off work for illness is a sense of anxiety for me. My last job had a great sick policy: if you’re sick, you are sick, and that's that. You were treated as an adult, and it was expected that you were capable of deciding when you needed to take off; that went for mental health days, too. Turns out I needed more time off than I thought. The way you have to do it, even as someone part-time with no benefits, is so tedious and borderline ridiculous for someone recovering from surgery. I understand getting a doctor's note, but I have to go through a third party that delays everything, and they have the ultimate say on whether or not I am approved. Meanwhile, I must keep calling daily even though they know I won’t be there. Because of this, I have decided to take the time off I need to completely recover rather than run back to work as soon as possible. 

As with everything else, the universe came in with its divine timing and forced me to take a break. I have been feeling completely exhausted and uninspired lately. Some weeks, I worked seven days a week, and the shifts were a mixture of opening and closing, so my sleep schedule was way out of whack. My life started to feel like it was falling apart. I got this job because I could focus on starting a reiki business, and my business has not been getting nearly enough love.  So, during my recovery, I will be focused on making changes and creating more content, as well as putting in motion a plan I have been dreaming up for a year. I have heard from clients, strangers, and friends looking for a community to hang out with that is interested in the same things (reiki, tarot,  crystals, moon rituals, celebrating pagan holidays, etc.) and one that doesn’t cost money to participate. A real community can’t be built on seeing group members as a source of income. I won’t say there won’t be a time when dues aren’t necessary if we have to rent a space or buy supplies, but the idea is to get together as a community of like-minded people to participate in special interests.  So be on the lookout for an invitation to join a full-moon circle in the next two months!